Posted in Daily Prompt, Life

The Absence of Breath

I want to go back to where my shoulders are not up to my ears. To the days where I was hungry not nauseous. Back to where my stomach was not in knots.

I want to breathe easy. I want to not feel like I am holding my breath. To not feel my heart beating rapidly in my chest. For it to not feel like my insides are running around and nothing will slow it down.

I want the world around me not to be moving at a snail’s pace, filled with traffic jams and slow walkers.

I want to feel purpose again in my life. I want to be able to say what I want. I want to have quiet time. I want to do things on my own.

I want there to be certainty for the future. I want to know what I will be doing next. I want to know what will the best path for me. I want to know if it is worth it to make a home for myself or will I be moving again in six months.

I want to read the news and for it not to be filled with people being assassinated, cars ramming into parties, children being blown up. I want the leaders who are supposed to be representing my needs, to actually do so, instead of doing things that seem like it is only for their gain and fame.

I want someone to massage my head or at least play with my hair. I want the knots in my back to be released. I want to not notice my stomach.

I want to breathe easy. I want to breathe. I want to breathe.

I want to relax.

via Daily Prompt: Relax

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Author:

I'm not always the greatest at sharing what is in my head. Here is a place that I am experimenting with sharing my ideas and thoughts. They are about my life, my experiences in becoming a rabbi, things that I see going on around me, and sometimes words of Torah.

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