Posted in Life

Goodbye NYC (for Now)!

The month in NYC flew by. It seems like it was only yesterday that I was moving my stuff into a random apartment in Washington Heights on a super hot and humid day.

The weather cooled, and it now feels like fall. The blasting music either stopped or I became used to it and so I stopped hearing it. I got used to the street being full while walking home, the sound of Spanish filling the air. I learned how to get home, which subway was the fastest and where to switch. I even was able to read on the subway because I wasn’t afraid of missing my stop.

It was not as bad as an experience as I thought it might be. there were things that I liked-like places being open almost always or the ease and quickness of the subway.There were things that I missed like knowing the makolet owner, and knowing where to get what I needed or wanted, or being able to eat in every restaunt/cafe that I went into.

Jewish life was also different. The communities are so large that they don’t notice when there are new people. I went to Slichot every night and no one said a word to me. What I found even stranger, was that I would actually walk most of the way home with people from shul, and they would hardly glance my way, even though we just left the same building. Granted, I could have initiated the conversation- but that is hard to do when there isn’t even eye contact made.

I also realized from speaking to people that they don’t leave New York, they don’t have a desire to until they get married. There is an idea that the ONLY place to find a mate is in New York City. Maybe they are right, but there is just so much more of the world to see and experience.

Also with regards to dating, there are women that have minimums for their potential spouse to make. Minimum of $300,000. That is just so crazy. For one that is just a lot of money. But in addition, that is so crazy to think more about money than the person. What is marriage for if not for the person?

I do think that as a city New York has something to offer. I mean, there really isn’t another city like it in the world. I still feel like it is too big for me. But I guess the goal of next year is to find a way to make it feel small and homey. I guess that would be able to happen once I am actually there and not there just for 3 weeks. I will hopefully be able to find a place to call my community, and find friends and like minded people to hang out with.


I am prone to overthinking and not to sharing. I decided to start writing and see what happens. So here are some stories and life situations (sometimes words of Torah) of a 30 something single woman, who happens to be a rabbi (received ordination in 2017- so there are posts of what that experience was like), will be working as a chaplain (and worked for years with older adults), is regularly asked what city she is located in (started the blog while living in Israel, found herself working in Australia, and will be in New York for at least a year), and is just trying to figure out her place in the world.

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